Heaven

[Maxmars]

Normally I would recommend a strong Belgian ale, or even glass of Mead.  

Other than that, have you tried playing some sort of ambient music in the background.  Perhaps even something that is recordings of  nature?

actually had some success with a beer or similar prior to bed... but my physician at the time balked at the practice because of "acclimatization" which could lead to needing more to get one drowsy.

Hence began my 'removal' from the world - via long term 'prescription' dependence... broken at the cost of my emotional health and family's well-being.  No more 'prescription' therapy since they seem to believe they can look at a book and declare "THE BOOK SAYS....," but resist any input I might have relative to me (not the 'book' patient... the actual patient presenting my symptoms... despite my 'claims' of discomfort and side effects... 'give it some more time' was the professional advice... I took it.   It almost killed me.

I stubbornly proceeded down a bad path, I completely understandably incredibly whole-heartedly support this personal non-medical advice "DON'T EVER DO THIS" cold-turkey nightmare... I stopped the drugs....

I'm thankful that didn't kill me... never again.

The net result is I have been coping as best I can... only emboldened to do so - now that I can no longer be employed... not having to perform by the clock makes life much easier for me... if not lonelier... that is very much the 'usual' time I begin introspective "thinking about myself' time....

and it seem true to me,... Thinking about myself is a ticket to depression.  (That's a train with many local stops.)

I can't wait until I grow up...  kinda silly to be such a child in my mind after so long in the world.

[Roma]

actually had some success with a beer or similar prior to bed... but my physician at the time balked at the practice because of "acclimatization" which could lead to needing more to get one drowsy.

Hence began my 'removal' from the world - via long term 'prescription' dependence... broken at the cost of my emotional health and family's well-being.  No more 'prescription' therapy since they seem to believe they can look at a book and declare "THE BOOK SAYS....," but resist any input I might have relative to me (not the 'book' patient... the actual patient presenting my symptoms... despite my 'claims' of discomfort and side effects... 'give it some more time' was the professional advice... I took it.   It almost killed me.

I stubbornly proceeded down a bad path, I completely understandably incredibly whole-heartedly support this personal non-medical advice "DON'T EVER DO THIS" cold-turkey nightmare... I stopped the drugs....

I'm thankful that didn't kill me... never again.

The net result is I have been coping as best I can... only emboldened to do so - now that I can no longer be employed... not having to perform by the clock makes life much easier for me... if not lonelier... that is very much the 'usual' time I begin introspective "thinking about myself' time....

and it seem true to me,... Thinking about myself is a ticket to depression.  (That's a train with many local stops.)

I can't wait until I grow up...  kinda silly to be such a child in my mind after so long in the world.

Ah man, sounds like you went through a rough time.  Sorry to hear this.  I'm no expert and I can only spitball some ideas, but here are a few...

Many folks find relief through writing.  Just put pen to paper and let it all flow.

For years I found relief by exercise and/or martial arts.  The days I trained hard I slept like a baby.  You could also look into Yoga or something more mind/body related.  There's always some positive 'side effects' that go along with a good training regimen.  

There are other folks here that would be better suited to provide spiritual advice.  I'm well aware that getting lost in your own mind in the middle of the night can be a scary place.  I'm also aware that it doesn't have to be that way.  You have control.

Good luck to you.

[Maxmars]

Ah man, sounds like you went through a rough time.  Sorry to hear this.  I'm no expert and I can only spitball some ideas, but here are a few...

Many folks find relief through writing.  Just put pen to paper and let it all flow.

For years I found relief by exercise and/or martial arts.  The days I trained hard I slept like a baby.  You could also look into Yoga or something more mind/body related.  There's always some positive 'side effects' that go along with a good training regimen.  

There are other folks here that would be better suited to provide spiritual advice.  I'm well aware that getting lost in your own mind in the middle of the night can be a scary place.  I'm also aware that it doesn't have to be that way.  You have control.

Good luck to you.

I appreciate your post.

But please excuse me if that all came off as a lament...  I can't feel it as such in my head anymore... it's more an observation - admittedly opinion... and some sentiment snuck in...

This is the nature of my life, often it happens inconvenient and befuddled at times, maybe even angry and resentful... even terribly difficult... at such times, I weep for those who plunge so deep they feel they can bear no more... for some damn reason my only reaction is only..."but I'm not finished."

Even when as wife left for the otherwise,
My selfish lament was that "I'm not done loving her." 

It seemed that many presumed my sorrow would lead me to that alone place... but how could it? 

I'm not alone... and more importantly... I wasn't sorry for me... I was sorry for losing my very best friend and my queen.

It's not about me... being 'alone' won't help.

Anyway...

I'm not done... so I am here... and I will stand.
(until you al make a poll and kick me out  )





Thanks for listening to my... well... stuff. 

[LightAngel]

I can't wait until I grow up...  kinda silly to be such a child in my mind after so long in the world.

I think it's important to keep our inner child, even if we live to be 100 years old, but it should be a sweet child of course, not a naughty one. 

I think keeping that inner child alive gives life its spark and playfulness.

When we nurture that gentle inner child, we often become more patient, and more open to simple happiness, and I think that is super healthy for us especially in this time and age.

I hope your sleep is better now.

[Nerb]

I see no 'dancers' here LightAngel, just the same old, same old.

You see what you want to see and you hear what you want to hear.

Cheer up.

[midicon]

You see what you want to see and you hear what you want to hear.

Cheer up.

I'm only human Nerb lol.

I always say to myself 'if it's not positive, don't post'.

Then I promptly fall asleep and post something stupid!

It's all good!

[BrotherKinsMan]

Yes.

Just, Yes.

^_^

[LightAngel]

Yes.

Just, Yes.

^_^

[LightAngel]

We are all small pieces of the cosmos.

Awake and aware, finding our way. 

[LightAngel]

Scientific Evidence of the Afterlife