To Chemo or not to Chemo

[xpert11]

NoRegretsever, I am deeply sorry for your loss.

The best decision was made from or with the information available. But I know that doesn't take away from your loss. Also, you are welcome to reach out in the future if you feel the need.

[NoRegretsEver]

NoRegretsever, I am deeply sorry for your loss.

The best decision was made from or with the information available. But I know that doesn't take away from your loss. Also, you are welcome to reach out in the future if you feel the need.



Thank you so very much, I don't know how this works just yet, but I hope you guys see this and want to thank you for your experiences, and warm thoughts.

[DontTreadOnMe]

So I will end with this. Knowing what many of us know, even if not believed but are aware of, would your choice if you didn't have one, be directed by what you have learned, shared, and been informed of if the time came? I never really considered it myself, and have written a living will, but many of my choices will I am sure be swayed by what I have learned over the years, and be misunderstood by those who don't subscribe to my thoughts and research.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I thought maybe by asking those in our community their thoughts, that I in fact may see things in a different light.

Peace, NRE

I am very sorry for your loss, NGE.
Your story touched my heart quite strongly.

My father was diagnosed with an aggressive lung cancer in September of 1988.  It was behind his heart they said.  They couldn't see it they said.  And by the time they did....

Chemo was started and like your husband, my dad lost a lot of weight.  He was only about 170 to start with and even though I am a woman, I bet I could have carried him towards the end.
Then end came in January 1989.  Not even 5 months later.

Like you, I question the use of Chemo.
If I had to make that decision myself, I would give hard thought to NO chemo.  I've had over 30 years to think about it.

[Byrd]

I'm so sorry for your loss.  The death of someone who's been part of your life for so long can be shattering.

And yes, with every death there's always "what if..." questions.  I had them when our son died (meningitis.)  But you DID try, you checked on things and you monitored and kept close watch on him.  You fought it to the end.  You didn't quit.  That takes strength and compassion (and an exhausting amount of energy.)

One thing that folks don't consider is that a change in treatment might have actually accelerated his death.  

Old timers on ATS know you, and we know how hard you work to make sure that you have the best information available whenever you have a question.  I believe in you.  I believe that you made the right decisions; the best decisions given what resources you had and what access you had.

[NoRegretsEver]

I am still learning this, am not sure how to reply to everyone.

I wanted to be sure to send so much love to you guys, for sharing your stories, and being so understanding, its been tough, but I am glad that I have a place I can share this. I am so glad that I am back.

Hugs, for each and everyone one of you!