The most underrated cryptid?

[Maxmars]

So I'm at this bar...

I'm feeling warm and relaxed... even more so.

The gentleman next to me had obliged me with conversation... and since it was on my mind, I mentioned this website I had been with for a while... "It's a really wide range of topics," I mentioned...

"How wide?" he asked, flatly, as he lifted his mug.

This exchange led to a place in which I completely lost my sense of time, and my sobriety.

He knew about this thing.  He kind of 'follows' it since he first saw it.... two years ago.

Of course I could never be drunk enough to not have that initial element of the story ignored.

He then went on a "hear me out" rant...

This thing... he has no name for it... definitely can look 100% human.
It's skin does change - at least tone...

It mimics people.. wears clothes, walks around, can smile, gesture...
it seems no threat.

Except ... it doesn't ever talk.
It can't.

Not a deficiency mind you... 

It has a tongue in its mouth like an iguana...

He witnessed it using it's tongue to eat a bird.

He's been obsessively stalking this "thing" for two years....

As I wander away from the bar, I stop and wait a moment, before retrieving my phone from my car...

And I can't stop thinking that this cryptid has absolutely no marketing power...

... I laughed out loud (silly I know) and I can imagine ..

it must be the most underrated cryptid of all time.

[argentus]

So I'm at this bar...

...

it must be the most underrated cryptid of all time.

Wonderful.    Knowing you and your writing style, I wonder what sort of allegory this 'cryptid' reflects, or if this tale reflects a wonder of a creature that we all sense, but never trust ourselves to talk about.   Well done

[SteamyAmerican]

Interesting.

somewhere I just came upon a story whereas a girl and her mom were in a park, and the girl sat stunned as she watched a man across from them use its tongue to furtively eat a sandwich.

No word on if word were exchanged.

[Maxmars]

Thank you kindly.

I have (of course) a TLDR 'version' but this is an attempt to finally write a really short story...

I think I did alright. 

[Maxmars]

Interesting.

somewhere I just came upon a story whereas a girl and her mom were in a park, and the girl sat stunned as she watched a man across from them use its tongue to furtively eat a sandwich.

No word on if word were exchanged.

Awesome... I'll look for that during our... pause.

Thanks for telling me!

[argentus]

Thank you kindly.

I have (of course) a TLDR 'version' but this is an attempt to finally write a really short story...

I think I did alright. 

Yes, you did more than alright.   You know how you know?   I didn't notice until just this moment that you posted this in 'short stories'.  Very well done.