Disturbing Text Messages From Disturbed Friends.

[IdeomotorPrisoner]

Disclaimer: This is a real text message from a friend that is NOT a member of ATS or DI. This person knows me well enough not to try this crap. It also deals with controversial issues, and ways i process that which screws up my day.

So my sometimes annoying (mostly) gay friend sent me this text message today.



He has yet to respond.

What the hell do you say to that? I almost said, "For the love of God would you go get laid!"

But I post this, because it's also really really sad. He is such a girl-minded boy too. His approach is a paragon of failed masculinity. Nevertheless, it got me thinking about the trans issue he so eloquently ALL CAPS TEXTED me the importance of to him.

He took the time to say he wanted to be a girl while simultaneouy denouncing transgender ideology? If I was a Star Trek robot, it might cause a self-destruct sequence.

He's conservative, Trump all the way. But it seems he's also really freaking dysphoric and angry. I am wondering if his conservatism has convinced him that he deserves to abuse himself over wanting to be a girl? Or what the real deal is here. And why he cares that he would be ugly.

And while I gotta somewhat appreciate him promising to stay out of my gender, It is still annoying and rude to send this trip to someone because you're having a bad day.

Never thought I'd say this, but this dude seriously needs Jesus, or at least INTENSE THERAPY, LOVE, something, because the prideful satan thing he/she does ruins my Fridays at work on an already agitating day.

Maybe you move somewhere liberal where nobody knows you and start taking hormones? Just stop laying your disturbed problems on me... unless you want me to turn it to a public topic of discussion with some anonymity remaining intact.

Maybe try to salvage their rather obvious pain into a psychology discussion. It seems like a real issue he's deliberately falling to shit over.

[Quantum12]

Disclaimer: This is a real text message from a friend that is NOT a member of ATS or DI. This person knows me well enough not to try this crap. It also deals with controversial issues, and ways i process that which screws up my day.

So my sometimes annoying (mostly) gay friend sent me this text message today.



He has yet to respond.

What the hell do you say to that? I almost said, "For the love of God would you go get laid!"


But I post this, because it's also really really sad. He is such a girl-minded boy too. His approach is a paragon of failed masculinity. Nevertheless, it got me thinking about the trans issue he so eloquently ALL CAPS TEXTED me the importance of to him.

He took the time to say he wanted to be a girl while simultaneouy denouncing transgender ideology? If I was a Star Trek robot, it might cause a self-destruct sequence.

He's conservative, Trump all the way. But it seems he's also really freaking dysphoric and angry. I am wondering if his conservatism has convinced him that he deserves to abuse himself over wanting to be a girl? Or what the real deal is here. And why he cares that he would be ugly.

And while I gotta somewhat appreciate him promising to stay out of my gender, It is still annoying and rude to send this trip to someone because you're having a bad day.

Never thought I'd say this, but this dude seriously needs Jesus, or at least INTENSE THERAPY, something, because the prideful satan thing he/she does ruins my Fridays at work on an already agitating day.

Maybe you move somewhere liberal where nobody knows you and start taking hormones? Just stop laying your disturbed problems on me... unless you want me to turn it to a public topic of discussion with some anonymity remaining intact.

Maybe try to salvage their rather obvious pain into a psychology discussion. It seems like a real issue hes deliberately falling to shit over.

OMG! I have a friend who text me the same crap all the time. They should hook up. She lives in Valencia.

She just text me crazy last night!

[IdeomotorPrisoner]

That's never a good thing. People too much like each other tend to be like a gasoline truck and a forest fire. Destined to be on a first name basis with the 3rd shift officers in their division.

He's a freaking mess and I tried to help him, did more than any sane person should do. And it kinda bugs me that he still treats himself poorly for something because it's "woke." Jeez, the trauma that must be responsible.

He's in California. He's in the state where no one cares. Where everything protects him. Yet he's noticeably angered by his inability to achieve happiness because of some biological limitation, and that he thinks defying it is BS. Or is too stubborn or superficial to consider he might be who actually benefits from transitioning. F what anyone says.

And I honestly don't wish him on anyone until he stops taking out his beta rage on others... and he picked a really bad day. But I am also trying to salvage this into a genuine trans-issue topic.

[BeTheGoddess]

Male till Fail... 

"I could never be a girl"? Thats to me a trans breakdown messsage,

And if it just try to be supportive. 

I could be wrong, but have seen messages like this from transwomen at that breaking point.

[Maxmars]

[A personal foreword]

Since I am not of the culture, I suppose my observations should be restricted...

it's too easy to conjure offense although none is intended,
it's too easy for my ignorance to be regarded as stubborn brutish insensitivity,
I've too often been sucked into an argument I never sought to be in.




This OP... the message within it, reflects some kind of tragedy... I mean, even if nothing were to come of it,  it appears to represents a painfully tragic state of affairs; my humble interpretation:

I feel alone,
I don't want to be alone,
It makes me furious that there are others who I perceive choose not to reach for me,

No one can 'reach' me, and no one wants to.

I'm going to shit on everyone, and everything,

I can't experience self-satisfaction. 
My self-image haunts me.
This is not what I want...
I will lash out against all who approach me as my errant image.



(Anger and frustration seem to be the message, threats and rage go hand in hand.)

Common responses would evoke remedial engagement, focusing on self-harm mitigation, and then likely heavy medication.  (In other words, a materialistic approach)
Once reduced to a lumbering, drooling, lump... materialists would walk away and call it a day... stupidly proving the message author's point... and ironically 'proud' of themselves, perhaps even virtue signaling about it.

A spiritual approach might risk engagement on emotional terms, and an appeal to the ideals of time and patience... but that does not address the 'feeling.' 

A religious approach calls to demand adherence to a body of tradition, or a structured set of precepts... but that is an imposition on the message author, and the time for such a thing is not now.

A different approach might an attempt to provide the author with the room to explain... (but to whom?)… room to explore the complaint... (but with whom.)  Once anger and frustration are evoked, the willingness to believe in resolution must override the passion to embrace it.  This message is a form of relief... the relief anyone could offer must be more attractive than the passion of the complaint.  That position can only be real if someone reaches the author in the light of conciliation, the faith of a friendly voice.

I have no understanding about the relationship this person has with the message recipient (or was it recipients?) but I am certain that relationship is an element of the message more pertinent than "I'm an angry frustrated transgender who simply wants to scream into the night sky."  Even if this is just a 'performance piece' the recipient choices are relevant.  Do you really want to help?  Or, it is just an exercise in voyeuristic observation?

My instinct is to say that such a message is a very plain "Please do something. Talk to me... please make me believe that you could care about me."

I don't know anyone like this personally (which is to say, no one I know has ever openly shared such agitation, primarily focused on existential disaffection.)  If I did, I would be compelled to engage... which is to say that his message was effective, for someone like me.   It evokes empathy... although not sympathy.

Why send it?  Could it be desperation?  Might it be solely a 'test' of the recipient's ability to be caring, as the sender conjures the idea of 'caring?'

My thoughts lean my response towards the idea of encouraging a separation from obsession over what we want, a dismissal of 'centering' only on what we feel, and the actual acceptance that those things are not now, nor ever are, rightly at the center of anyone's reality.  I would gently suggest experiencing a different focus... at least insofar as not obsessing over sex, sexual attractiveness, the social dance of desirability, or the notion that there will ever be a perfect state of affairs in that light.

But then that supposes I do care...  and isn't that alone the actual constructive answer to the message?

Maybe the first short answer to that message should be "I care." 
Simple, short, direct. 

If and when the sender responds that the "I care" answer isn't enough, only then can you find what the cause and fire of the message really is.

The message itself screams 'slamming the door closed.'
It must be opened again before any healing conversation can continue.

[personal closing statement - I hope I've offended no one, I understand that the principle component of the OP is the transgender element... but I think this message isn't really about transgenderism... it applies regardless of social choices... it's likely the social reactions that inflame the problem.  And at least as my opinion, transgenderism is not a useful point of focus, any more than heterosexuality could ever be.  Again, no offense intended.]

[Quantum12]

That's never a good thing. People too much like each other tend to be like a gasoline truck and a forest fire. Destined to be on a first name basis with the 3rd shift officers in their division.

He's a freaking mess and I tried to help him, did more than any sane person should do. And it kinda bugs me that he still treats himself poorly for something because it's "woke." Jeez, the trauma that must be responsible.

He's in California. He's in the state where no one cares. Where everything protects him. Yet he's noticeably angered by his inability to achieve happiness because of some biological limitation, and that he thinks defying it is BS. Or is too stubborn or superficial to consider he might be who actually benefits from transitioning. F what anyone says.


And I honestly don't wish him on anyone until he stops taking out his beta rage on others... and he picked a really bad day. But I am also trying to salvage this into a genuine trans-issue topic.

She lives near Sherman Oaks! She just text me crazy again how she moved. They can have each other and text from different rooms lol!

I agree about California where no one cares. I used to live in Santa Monica and the door is always slammed on your face!

[jaded]

There is mostly nothing I can say without sounding like a @zzhat. 
Like that would stop me. 

Gonna say the same thing here I do & have in RL.
"Trying out for the 2028 Feels Olympics?"
Life isn't all about you & if doors are slamming in your face you're obviously in the wrong room!
The best way to get over yourself is to go volunteer somewhere.
NOBODY cares who or what you are at the soup kitchen, animal shelter, local library. They only care if your hands work and you can manage a smile.
Most importantly...
"Your the ONLY ONE who thinks you're worthless". Like, do you see anyone here agreeing with you? NOPE!

Like the DMV. I don't do drama-dumps, I don't reward bad behavior, stand behind the line an pull your head out. I will walk with you while you fix your "snip" but I'm NOT going to drown in it with you. 

This makes my kids crazy, my co-workers crazy, friends sometimes crazy. If someone dumps their cray-cray at my feet they've completely lost their minds. I'm not the brownie baking happy hugs enabling granny. She lives across town, need directions??

Very sorry this text happened to you!!! Not seeing it as any kind of Tran's issue tho. Just someone who's desperately unhappy reaching out in all the wrong ways. People be people an we're all staggering thru life together trying to figure it out.

[schuyler]

Mentally ill.

[IdeomotorPrisoner]

This is a thread I want back, but it screwed up my day, and my empathy for his traumatic self pity party has about run it's course.

This "Oh won't you please stop me from self-destructing." thing is borderline and a little feminine - like a passive-aggressive drama queen, of any gender, but im genuinely wondering if he's serious. Kinda like wolf cries with a little bit of emotional blackmail reading it.

Worth noting, is he's a self-proclaimed "satanist," which factors into this more than you'd think. Especially all the spiteful pride shit he did deliberately to keep himself alone - for control. No letting anything not dictated by him happen. Now, I'm wondering if the deprivation psychologically split his mind in a dissociative or even "demonic" way somewhere along the lines.

But he should still know better than to make his problems other people's if it doesn't concern them. That's a sin. Thou shalt STFU about your failures to people that don't want to hear it.

Go try a different religion and Get a grip.

[Quantum12]

This is a thread I want back, but it screwed up my day, and my empathy for his traumatic self pity party has about run it's course.

This "Oh won't you please stop me from self-destructing." thing is borderline and a little feminine - like a passive-aggressive drama queen, of any gender, but im genuinely wondering if he's serious. Kinda like wolf cries with a little bit of emotional blackmail reading it.

Worth noting, is he's a self-proclaimed "satanist," which factors into this more than you'd think. Especially all the spiteful pride shit he did deliberately to keep himself alone - for control. No letting anything not dictated by him happen. Now, I'm wondering if the deprivation psychologically split his mind in a dissociative or even "demonic" way somewhere along the lines.

But he should still know better than to make his problems other people's if it doesn't concern them. That's a sin. Thou shalt STFU about your failures to people that don't want to hear it.

Go try a different religion and Get a grip.

Totally get this!
Send him to MDR next week! The end of Washington St!